"This is how the birth of Jesus the Messiah came about: His mother Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be pregnant through the Holy Spirit. Because Joseph her husband was faithful to the law, and yet did not want to expose her to public disgrace, he had in mind to divorce her quietly."
Gospel of Matthew
Anyone familiar with the St. Ignatius Spiritual Exercises knows that a common method of prayer that he recommends is to read a story in scripture, and then imagine yourself as part of the story. You can assume the role of one of the characters of the story or just be there as an observer of the events as they take place.
The Gospel story from Matthew about Mary and Joseph and how Jesus came to be born provides an excellent opportunity for this type of prayer. By putting yourself in their story, you move beyond just the reading of the events. You actually become the story, experiencing the struggles, the fears, the apprehensions, the joys or sorrows that arise.
By placing yourself in the above Gospel story as an observer, you meet Mary, such a young girl to be facing such an enormous challenge to her faith and trust in God. As is the custom in her Jewish family, she is entering a marriage with a very young man, probably chosen for her by her family. Being only in her mid teens, she must be experiencing all the apprehensions of this engagement, including the moving away from the current family connections in her parents' home, into an uncertain new relationships with Joseph and his family. Then she is called to respond to the Holy Spirit in a manner that could jeopardize and certainly complicate the relationships on both sides - the family she is leaving and the relationships she is entering into. Saying "yes" to such a request meant taking the risk of destroying the relationships on both sides. Yet, as she ponders the situation in her heart in silence, her faith and trust in God outweighs all the possible consequences that were likely to happen if she did say "yes". To Mary, God was worth the risk. And she trusted in God to work out the details.
With the facts of her pregnancy coming out, Joseph was really left with no recourse in accordance with his family tradition. He did not wish to embarrass Mary or punish her family. That was not his way. But he would react, as expected of him, by breaking the engagement and quietly moving away from what could be a very embarrassing situation for him and his family.
But what was to intervene was not a rational response, but a response of faith. In the silence of prayer, in a vision or dream, Joseph followed the guidance coming to him from another source deep from within himself. He was asked to believe that which others would probably not believe, to accept that which others would probably not accept. And at great risk to himself, he decided to set aside all that was rational and cultural, and follow his heart. Let it be done to us in accordance to your will Oh Lord.
The decisions of both Mary and Joseph challenge each of us in our own lives as we are faced with the multiplicity of decisions that come our way. Do we take the path that is rational, that is safe, that conforms with the opinions of the many; or do we listen deeper to the movements of the Spirit within our own hearts. Do we respond in a manner that may not make much rational sense to us now, but we know comes from God.
“Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. She will give birth to a son, and you are to give him the name Jesus. When Joseph woke up, he did what the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took Mary home as his wife."
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